Friday, October 26, 2007

Karma

Do you believe in Karma?

I do.

And after lunch today, I believe that I'm not just bearing my own. =(

Hiding

I've been avoiding the areas of Suntec, Marina, Bishan and AMK for about a month now.

One day, I hope to be able to go there freely again... soon...

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Wandering / Wondering...

I can't help myself, but my mind constantly wanders to thoughts of her...

And I wonder...

Creating a lot of questions, for which I have no answers...

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Hope, Faith and Love

I wrote about this earlier in the year.

Then, it was about reaching out to your fellow man, to show some concern to those who think they have no one else who cares, and to make a difference to their day and for a brief moment, take the bitterness away from their tired lives.

I'm writing on this title today with regards to relationships.

I think sometimes, in order to make a relationship work, its about having hope, that somethings may/have/will change.

To have faith and trust in your partner.

And of course, to love him/her whole-heartedly.

I hope this message rings out to at least one of my readers. Because in recent weeks, I have realised how I have failed in all fronts. Much to my great regret.

And so now, I am this fool, hoping for a call to come... although I don't believe it will.

Choices

We all make many choices throughout the day.

Most are small and don't matter. Be it what to wear today, what letters to place on the scrabble board or what to eat for lunch.

And then there are those which could seriously affect your own life, or the lives of people around you.

I have made some bad choices in life. As much as I tell myself that I should not regret making them, that is, had I been placed in the identical situation today, I would have made the same call... there are those which I shall hold myself responsible for the rest of my life.

I've been watching My Name is Earl. In fact, I've almost completed 2 seasons worth in 2 weeks.

There are some episodes where the protagonist realises that some of the bad things he did actually helped make the affected the party better (change in life, making them a better person etc)

So, if you believe that our lives are written in a book somewhere somehow when we were conceived, I cannot help but think...

Does everything happen for a reason?

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Twitch

My right upper eyelid is twitching incessantly...

Google (the most up to date of doctors) says that it can mean:

1. That something good is going to happen to me
2. Someone is talking / thinking of me
3. I have low electrolyte levels of potassium and calcium
4. My right eye is tired

Hopefully is Number 1. Although I did play badminton on Sunday and Monday, and I haven't been sleeping enough either. =P

On an unrelated note, my bum bum hurts from playing badminton. =(

Monday, October 22, 2007

Just In Case...

Just in case anyone is wondering...

I'm not writing here for anyone to feel sorry for me.

The last time I wrote like this was many years ago. But I guess the feeling is the same this time round too.

I'm writing here so that I won't forget how I'm feeling. And one day in the future, perhaps, I can look back and smile at this.

Formula One


In a most exciting, nail biting (would Lewis catch up? will someone crash in the last 10 laps?), accident filled (first time i've seen pit crew run over), kelong (Kimi overtake & Lewis gear shift problems?), brilliant display of team work (Ferrari at turn one), display of why Alonso would not be in McLaren next year (also turn one) race at Interlagos this morning.

Ferrari has emerged World Champions through Kimi by one point!

Was a great race. I'm going to be sleepy for the rest of the day now. =(

Weekend

Had an event filled weekend consisting of work, poker, badminton, a barbecue.

But why do I feel like I haven't accomplished everything? That as much as I know that I would have nothing to do otherwise, that I cannot wait to run home?

I is f@&$ed up.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

No More.

Its over.

But I cannot come to terms with it.

It was my fault, but I cannot help but ask why.

They say men take it easier than women, but I don't think so.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Never Say Never

Never thought I would drunk dial ever again. Thought I was past that....

But I drunk smsed instead. Hope I didn't screw it up again. =(

Monday, October 15, 2007

I is F&@*#! Up

I am so f@#$&% up that I can't even keep a promise to myself.

How screwed up am i?

Sigh sigh....

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Good & Bad

The good and bad thing about my new office is that by 6.30, only about 5% of the staff are left. No chance to work late cos they will lock up by 7pm.

Good or bad?

Sucks though, if you are rushing a deadline.

Ouch

What causes ulcers in the mouth? They hurt!

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

Not All Here

I feel like I have lost a bit of my soul.

Am I'm not all here.

Distracted and careless.

Thursday, October 04, 2007

This Has Been Said Before...

Only in times of crisis, do you know who you true friends are.

But you wonder if some of them know you at all.

What Would You Do?

If this ex-colleague of yours keeps messaging you online, telling you about who he has slept with, how good his job is, that he is earning big money on the stock market....

And you are seriously not interested / impressed.

I'm too polite to tell him to fxxx off but also, i'm getting quite irritated by his nonsense.

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Sleep

Does not come easy to those burdened by guilt and weighed down with emotions.

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Maligned

For all good intentions. Accused of schemes when there were none.

Your words against mine. The burden of proof is for me to prove, if I only get the chance to.

Monday, October 01, 2007

Too Little, Too Late

These four words, keep replaying in my head.

Tired

Is my mind, body and soul.

Empty

Best describes the way I feel now.

Like a shell of my former self. Walking around in automatic mode. Seeing but not processing information.