Winner of the "Last Thing" I saw before I died Competition.

Ouch Ouch

Ouch

More Weird Dreams

I started dreaming at around 4am this morning... I know cos I opened my eyes to look at the radio-clock.

I dreamt about a whole scene from Harry Potter... going through Umbridge's luggage, speaking to elves, getting on the Hogwart's Express, getting shot by an arrow and not being able to stop bleeding until Hermoine came over and did some mumbo jumbo...

The worrying thing is, I haven't even caught the movie yet, and the dream was probably a combination of my desire to watch it, coupled with some deep memories of the book I read 2 years ago.

Better go catch it soon. Before I go crazy. Haha.

Entreprenuer in the making. =P

Right message, Wrong method. Doesn't that happen to us sometimes?

Happiness

Happiness is in the air around me.

Am I blind to it? Or is it just avoiding me?

Monday 28.11

Weird dreams last night. Pictures of people popped into my head. Emailed them this morning to see if they were well.

Feel the need for a good sweat. Lack exercise. Maybe I shall go for a run later. If I manage to get out of here early enough.

Juicy?

Life, as we know it.

Silence

Its late. The office is silent, I'm the only on the floor. You hear things you never hear, in the bustle of day.

New Theory

Just got out of a meeting at 6.30pm. Need to work on it to present shite tmr afternoon.

Tired, grumpy, and generally cheesed off.

Epiphany.

Due to limited time, time should only be retained for those who add value to my life. The others just won't matter.

Haha. No offence, people.

I'm not good for you

Just realised that I'm too pessimistic, negative and generally not good for the people around me.

1. Just got off the phone with an old friend, who, eventhough she1 is bogged down by the life around her, she1 still is able to remain chirpy and optimistic, like the last I remembered her.

2. Just read something online. Had she2 taken my advice, she2 would not be happy today.

Hence I conclude. Like a bitter pill. I'm bad for people.

I want to go LA.

You Want?

Game on.

Non discreet medical service

Eyes

Eyes hurt. Must be either MSG or lack of sleep.

Did a medical today. Blood pressure is high. 140/90 I'm freaking 25 for goodness sakes!

Must be work, or some people who are driving me up the wall.

Hahaha

Haha.

The Ad guys are getting less creative.

Why we need to sleep more...

The Good in Me

Just when I thought I should remain a cold, heartless, blank of a person...

I recieved a phonecall last night from a friend who is ill.

And I realised I am not cold, heartless and emotionless at all.

Sweet Adorable Monsters who will Rip your Guts Out

Some people shouldn't be allowed to have children.

Experienced it this weekend.

Not with him though.

Fairy Tales gone bad. =P

Pinball?

Confused...

A friend says she's confused. She's a great girl... I think...

I hope its not what I'm thinking.

Not another one, lost to the Dark Side.

Sorry for being cryptic.

Sunday

Whoopee! New computer is working!!

Sigh... Went shopping for a new mobile. Couldn't get one. I guess its not my time yet....

According to some, this is true. Right?

Horny horn dog.

Distracted

I've been distracted these few days with what's coming in my inbox...

Grr... going to go mad soon.

Crazy Fans

There has been a group of girls sitting outside Tiong Bahru Plaza since Monday. Today, I finally spied why they were there.

5566 is coming on Sat.

Crazy... They have been sitting there, in the rain and shine, overnight, 5 days before their idols arrive.

Too bad I don't have a digital camera.

Oh, today some aunties joined them. Eww...

Hope thats bullet proof glass.

Craak

9.45am. Time to start cracking.

Birthdays

Month of November.

Lots of birthdays.

Realised birthdays are depressing, even if they are not mine. People usually come to some life philosophy epiphany on their birthdays.

Birthdays are even more depressing if they are celebrated on weeknights where you cannot drink yourself silly to numb the senses, and your pub singer is singing Christmas carols in the background.

Depressing especially if you have to spend it alone. Or worse, with a room of strangers. And the worst, if the strangers are all coupled up and having a good time with each other and you are just sitting there nursing a Black Label.

Bah.

It happens.

Morning...

Late night office humor.

Scary

Cynic

Realisation:

You cannot be cared for if you don't care for others.

Forgotten Innocence...

As I stare blankly out of the windows of the moving train, looking at the drenched world out there. I came to realise that I have forgotten the feeling of being in love... the heart palpitations, the joy at watching her smile, the long hugs and soft kisses...

Its cold inside. And it might be better that way.

Haha.

What Drives You?

Fear.

The fear of being alone.

The fear of no one caring for you.

The fear of not having money to carry out your dreams.

When there is no hope, no goal, there is no fear. And hence, no drive.

The Weekend

The weekend made me thankful for a few things.

1. Vic, for generously letting me crash on her couch on Friday, and a) not calling the police to have me removed, b) not getting the guys to move me to the garden and c) for not taking a big glass of cold water and pouring it over my head to wake me. Oh, and sorry for snoring and sneaking out like a thief in the night the next morning.

2. My friends, who made me watch my first horror movie in many many years. The experience was ruined by some malay kids who couldn't stop talking and the show wasn't that scary. I must say, all in all, Emily Rose was a let down.

3. I must thank my mom, who called me to ask me home for dinner. That was so sweet. But I had dinner at TCC instead.

4. JY, who came straight down from the airport just to have one drink with me. Yes, I am regretting that one drink this morning.

5. R, who gave me one and a half years of her happiness. The good years of my life. Happy Birthday.

6. Jos, who I am thankful for not going mental on me.

7. My driving instructor, who passed my session eventhough I had 3 immediate failures, revved the car to 4,000rpm. But then again, we always have fun.

8. My bed, for taking me in so early on Sat night, when I decided that I was too lazy to go out.

9. To anyone else I have failed to mention.

Got a Minute?

You got to read this.

Link

Oh, and type in "failure" into Google and click "I'm feeling lucky"

*sizzle*

Haha.

Friday

Met a friend for dinner last night.

She said I looked depressed.

And that I put on weight.

Sigh...

Theory

Ai mai suah

If you don't want, then I don't either.

*sizzle*

Comes up and bites you in the a**

Just when I thought I could forget, I get reminded again.

My mom asked me to configure her phone last night. Sigh...

Pillow Talk

When I was a child, I used to cover both my ears with my pillows whenever I was scared. Be it thunder, mommy scolding me for not packing my bags for school, or if I had exams the next day. I'll do it cos it shuts off the noise from the world, the hum of the air-conditioner, the chatter from the tv...

I realised that over the past nights, I've been subconciously doing it again.

Weird. Heh.

*sizzle*

Remaking Singapore

Germany has Mercedes Benz, Sweden has Volvo, Switzerland has Nestle, UK has Cadbury Schwepps, US has Microsoft, Japan has a whole pop culture they are exporting by the container load.

What does Singapore have?

Creative is in the doldrums and honestly, Enzer and Akira are not meant for First World Markets.

I work in a firm who helps SMEs who want to grow to become MNCs. We do this through raising funds, restructuring, M+As...

I think the need is imminent. Singapore has always been portrayed as a 'cheaper' location for quality manufacturing. But once the rising Asian tide of India and China catch up, all of us will be out of a job.

So, we can either create a globally recognised brand to export, or move into something we are already good at.

Like trading and brokering. Having said that, I've been meeting a lot of them in recent times. Brokering everything from petro-chemicals to ships to container space to commodities. We should capitalise on that because it is a service industry based on global needs and is hence eternal (until the next recession).

We really need to remake Singapore, or...

Back to the Regular Program x2

Quote from a friend "For her I will turn lesbian" *snigger*

Thoughts

It's will be the 1st year anniversary of its death soon. I cannot help thinking about. It.

Wonder if its the same on the other side?

Back, to the regular scheduled program.

Another "Survey"

7 Occasions & Locations...*Rolls eyes*

1. If given a choice to decide your birth, where would you choose?
I would loved to have been born in the UK. Though its not as "safe" as Singapore, its not as sanitised either. Its rich culture, balance of arts and science might have made me a more rounded person.

2. If given a choice to meet your first friend, who will be with you for a lifetime, where will it be?
It would in kindergarden, or anywhere else as soon as possible. If its a really close friend, then we should meet as early as we can right?

3. If there's a flight accident and you end up lost somewhere, at the end of the day, where do you hope you are at?
A white sand beach, lined with fruit trees and inhabited by stupid animals (easier to trap).

4. Where did you hope to have met your first love?
In University, and I did. =(

5. Where would you want to have your wedding?
Anywhere. The location is not the priority if 'she' is there. It just shouldn't be the circus we as Singaporeans know as a wedding - the early morning wake up, rushing around from place to place, a wedding dinner with 800 of my 'closest' friends that I don't know.

6. Where do you hope to enjoy your life when you've retired?
I agree with Chris, somewhere in the country, but an hour from a big city. So, somewhere like Tuscany?

7. Everyone will die sooner or later. If given a choice to decide your deathplace, where will it be?
On land. Funerals are for the living, so I can imagine the pain of losing a loved one at sea, or just lost. I think the act of burial/cremation is a form of closure for the ones alive, and so I really pity those families who have lost their loved ones in air crashes, at sea... The hope they cling on to that the deceased may still be alive would not allow them to move on.

Lynn Chen from the movie. Hubba hubba.

Saving Face

If you are can only watch one movie this week, watch Saving Face. I caught it last nite and its a brilliant movie, filled with a strong storyline, excellant acting and beautiful leads.

Empty

On nights like this, I think about the frenzied but empty life I am leading...

BO

What they say is true.

People with Body Odours cannot smell it themselves.

Take a shower or use deodearant for crying out loud!

P.S.> Hey people, you must let me know if I smell bad yah?

Grouch

I suppose everyone who has to go into work today must be feeling damn grouchy. This break-work-break-work routine is damn bad for morale lah.

Stupid

I think Singaporeans (and yes I do possess a pink I/C) are a damn stupid bunch.

On one hand we complain that Singapore is too legislated a country. Too controlled. Stifles creativity. Big Brother is always watching...

On the other hand, we have idiots who call to legislate more shite. Things like High Intensity Discharge lamps, rude shoppers, handicapped toilet abusers... Why can't we, as a 'civilised' society take things into our own hands and just control ourselves based on our consciences, values or moral standards?

Stop spitting on the road not because you might get slapped with a $500 fine. Stop spitting because you hate stepping onto spit (and risk slipping and breaking your head) and so control yourself so that no one steps onto yours.

Don't do unto others, what you do not want others to do to you.

Why can't Singaporeans understand such a simple principle? Or are we too Asian still? Asians who live in a selfish, dog-eat-dog society, driven by self-preservation and ignorance of the world around us?

Stupid.

Heatiness

Heatiness makes your body feel hot. Aircon is set at 21 degrees and I'm still burning up.

Heatiness makes your phelgm very sticky, and chokes up all the pipes.

Heatiness makes your eyes burn.

Heatiness makes your tongue swell.

Heatiness makes you constantly thirsty, and no amount of water you drink quenches the thirst.

Heatiness makes everything you eat jelat.

Heatiness makes you physically sick.

Heatiness makes makes you irritable.

Heatiness makes you damn f@$%ing randy.

Time for liang teh. Or beer.

Update 1718hrs: I need a farking injection of ice into my veins.

Happy Holidays

Over the extended weekend, I had an epiphany.

The Past Should Stay in the Past. Its better that way if I want to be happy now.

Cut.